Week 4, Day 1 - I have to do what?

I am so very glad that I didn't read ahead to today's workout ahead of time.  It would have given me far too much time to fret.  The task seemed very daunting to me:  3 minutes of running, followed by 90 seconds of walking followed by 5 minutes of running and then repeat it all again.  I decided that my best approach would be to get a lot of extra warm up and stretching in advance, so I walked for quite a while before I stopped and got in a great stretch session.  Then I started the Chubby Jones week 4 podcast and got moving once again. 

I was pleasantly surprised to find that the first eight minutes of running went extremely well.  In fairness, part of the first 5 minute run was downhill, so that helped, but I was feeling good at the end.  The vengefully fast 90 seconds of walking between runs seemed too short, but  isn't it always?  The next three minutes were good, but I was starting to slow down a bit.  But oh boy, that last 5 minutes really killed me.  I did OK for the fir 2 minutes, but then I was really hitting the wall.  I really had to push myself.  Mia kept coming on to be encouraging and was pushing for a last kick of speed to end the run, but there was no reserves for me to do that.  I made it the full distance, but man, it exhausted me.  I walked for a while afterwards.  I just needed to keep moving, albeit, very slowly.  I even passed my house and kept walking because I felt the need to keep cooling down.  I wanted to have my breath back and feel human again when I got home.  I was at a particularly enthralling place in my audio book, so the extra time was nice.

So, I'm home now, baby is napping and my husband took our son to a baseball game. I have utter silence and solitude and I didn't even need to lace up my running shoes to get it. So on that note, I will leave you for today. I am tired and glad for a day of rest, but feel sure the next run will be even better.  I would have found it impossible to believe a month ago that I was capable of finishing a run like today's.  I need to remember that going forward, because bigger and more difficult challenges await me!  No matter what though, I'll be out there, working hard and trying to make myself a stronger and healthier person because I know that I CAN DO IT!

Week 3, Day 4 - Another week bites the dust!

Today is going to be a good day.  I can tell.  I woke up feeling well rested and looking forward to my run.  And even though it was raining really hard (seriously, I am about to start a new Noah's Ark themed blog), I couldn't wait to get outside.  I stretched in the rain and to my great delight, just as I started walking, the rain stopped.  This really is going to be a good day!

My run went well too.  I felt pretty loose and strong through all the runs.  I even added in an extra 3 minutes run to test my endurance a little.  I was tired at the end, no doubt, and there was certainly less spring in my step for the rest of the walk home, but I started and finished strong and that feels so great.  I'm not even going to look ahead to what comes next in week 4 until tomorrow because I want to ride high the rest of the day without fretting about the next big leap I am about to take.

This entire experience so far has been so empowering to me in so many ways.  First, taking the steps to make this time for myself.  Sleep is great, don't get me wrong, I love sleep, but there is no better way to start the day than getting up alone, leaving the house alone, and doing something that makes me feel good in my body and my mind.  To feel such a sense of accomplishment by 7:30 in the morning is great!  Second, having found an outlet to talk about the experiences I am having, whether they are good or bad, has been huge.  It is so nice to use this part of my brain on a regular basis.  It is surprising how little it gets used when your mothering and housekeeping and you don't realize it until you start using it again!  And last, though I absolutely love and need to the support of my friends and my family, I have found the support and encouragement from my fellow C25Kers and bloggers to be inspiring, motivating, and heartfelt.  We need each other as much as we need our loved ones.  There is an understanding and a true sense of camaraderie in this community.  We all seem to relish each other's successes and feel each other's pain.  And though I have not met the other people I have been going through this program with, I feel so invested in urging them on and enjoying their successes as much as my own.  It has been an unintended but unbelievably wonderful benefit of writing this blog.   So friends, keep up the great work!  If you can do it, I CAN DO IT!

Week 3, Day 3 - No rain, no gain

I need to start going to bed earlier.  That was my first thought this morning when the alarm went off at 6:20.  Didn't turn over to go to sleep last night until 11:30 and then had my slumber rudely interrupted by my daughter at 3:30.  I have plans to meet some girlfriends in town this evening for a Cosmo and some Sex in the City 2, so it will be a late one and the prospects of me getting any sleep between now and then are doubtful.  As I continue on, I know that being well rested is going to be a key to my success, so today a new resolution is born:  I must get to bed by 10:30 the night before a run.

I allowed myself a single snooze and then bounded out of bed and got ready to go.  It was raining pretty hard this morning, so I threw on a rain jacket and headed out the door.  I had hoped to get in a little extra warm up walking before I started the C25K podcast, but it was too wet and I just wanted to get it done, so I stretched and jumped right into my 5 minute walk.  The first 90 second run was OK, though I still felt a little tight.  I did a little extra stretching during the 90 seconds of walking and the 3 minutes of running that came next were great.  I felt looser and was really into it.  When Mia told me to slow it down, I think I could have kept going.  When the next 90 seconds came, I powered through and did well, but the last 3 minutes of running seemed unbearable.  Honestly, it was night and day from the first 3 minutes.  I am not sure if it is all in my head or if there is too much walking in between or what.  If I look back, I always struggle with the day 3 workout and then kick ass on day 4.  I don't know...I am going to do another week 3 workout just because it has worked out so well for me up to now.  I am planning on adding one more interval to increase the challenge a bit and see how I do. 

One thing I think I'll reconsider in the future is the rain jacket.  It was both too hot and too heavy (not that I don't like hot and heavy like the next person, just not while jogging!).  If anyone out there has any suggestions on what to wear in the rain, I'd love to hear them.  I figure unless any better ideas come my way,  I'll be going with the C25K wet t-shirt program.  Who knows, maybe I'll inspire some new runners that way!  In the meantime, you all keep up the good work and I will too.  Remember, when excuses start to clutter your thoughts, beat them back with the mantra of champions:  I CAN DO IT!

Week 3, Day 2 - just a matter of getting out the door

It has been a glorious weekend.  The best weather we've had all year and lots of fun activities, parties and BBQing.  The perfect Memorial Day weekend filled with lots of sunshine.  And let me just tell you, it has taken it out of me!  The entire family slept in this morning and the kids did not wake me until 8:30.  We got on with the morning shuffle of coffee, juice, oatmeal and at about 10:00 I decided that I needed to get moving or I might never make it out.  So I dressed and was ready to go, but was still finding it hard to take that step out of the house.  To be completely honest, I was not really motivated to run as much as I was motivated to not let myself down.  With some encouragement from my supportive husband and kids, however, I was able get a move on.

I started with a little audio book today though and walked a good 1/2 mile before I fired up the C25K podcast.  Was feeling a little slow and stiff and figured a little extra warm-up would do me right...which it did.  I felt much better during the entire run today than I did on W3D1.  At the end of my second interval, I was actually feeling like I could keep going.  In fact, when Mia announced that we were done, I still did one more run. 

I can't believe how far I've come in such a short time.  If I could bottle up how I feel about myself and let people sample it, everyone would be doing this.  And what is so crazy to me is that as good as I am feeling now and as far as I have come, I am still just at the beginning.  While I am intimidated by what is yet to come (W5D3, gulp), I am so excited to get there and know the feeling that will come with accomplishing it.  2010 did not get off to the best start for me and for a while there, it seemed like this would become just another year of broken resolutions.  I am so grateful to have found this program and that it has helped me find myself again.  No more doubt, no more excuses, no more forgetting to take care of me...I can do it!

Week 3, Day 1 - and a little about "the number"

My husband will be reading this, so I won't say too much on the subject, but our alarm went off this morning at the same exact time that both children woke up and there was a new sense of motivation that came with watching him get up and tend to the kids while I dressed and readied myself for the big run!  This was needed, as I was stuck in a bit of dread about the start of week 3...

I was ready though, had my week 3 podcast all queued up, stretched and was off.  I had what I hoped was a relatively dog-free route planned (since I hadn't gotten my mace yet) and I found that being out on the road a bit later than normal, there were many more joggers on the road.  I love the knowing nod that you give one another as you pass by.  The one that silently aknowledges that, "we kick ass!"  My first 90 second interval went well and I even felt ready to run again when the time came.  The next run, 3 long minutes worth, was actually not too bad.  No lie, I was very happy when Mia told me to slow it down and was equally happy to hear that even she was dreading this run.  Before I knew it, even though it was 3 minutes of walking, it was time to run 90 more seconds.  They weren't the quickest 90 seconds ever, that would be saved for the next 90 seconds of walking.  I felt like I had barely caught my breath when my next 3 minutes of running began.  This one seemed long.  Mia kept coming on to be encouraging.  After ninety seconds, she said, "You're half-way there!"  What the EFFFF?  Only half way there?  I felt like I had been running for way longer than 90 seconds.  But it came to an end and I was ever so greatful to walk for 3 more minutes.  The last interval was difficult, and even though Mia was encouraging me to push it hard, I was not able to push it beyond a slow jog.  That's OK though, I made it!  I did it!  I was so relieved to have some time to walk and breath, and listen to my book.   It is a very gratifying part of the experience.

When I got home, I had to jump back into action to get me and my family ready for some morning plans we had.  I got the shower started and decided to jump on the scale and see how I was doing.  I've been eating really well since starting this program and have all but cut out deserts and unnecessary snacking.  So, naked and without any food in my body, I stepped on and took in the new number:  178.  3 1/2 pounds down from the beginning of the month.  I know that's good, especially since I know I am building muscle right now.  The reality is that the number doesn't really reflect the real changes I can see for myself, that I can feel when I button my pants.  That is why my goals didn't include any specific new number...I knew that as I got back into shape the number wouldn't spiral downward very quickly.  Still, can't help but wish that I'd been more pleasantly surprised.  it is what it is though and I still feel good about myself.  Actually, I feel great.  I was afraid of this workout I had to take on today, but I conquered it.  I didn't give up and because of that, I grow ever confidant that no matter what the challenge before me, I CAN DO IT!

Week 2, Day 4 - Another close encounter of the canine kind

This morning did not go to plan exactly.  Despite ensuring last night that my alarm was set to the right time, set to a.m. and was turned on, I was not awoken at 6:35.  By some stroke of luck, my husband happened to open his eyes and see that it was almost 6:50 and woke me up.  It seems that the radio station dial had been messed with and the volume turned all the way down.  I have a little 23 pound suspect who gets her hands into everything these days, but since she doesn't speak yet, the questioning will have to wait.

I dressed quickly and dashed out the door, forgoing my usual stretch session and got right to the 5 minute walk.  I stopped once or twice to stretch my calves and shins, but my fourth week 2 run came upon me quickly.  I was not as loose as I normally am, so I wasn't really hitting my stride right away.  I took a new route today to keep it fresh and it did not take me long to regret it.  In the middle of my first run interval, I watched as a huge black do came running out of its yard toward me barking.  It stopped advancing me when it was about 10 feet away, but kept barking and growling.  I was paralyzed with fear and was completely unsure what do do.  I moved slowly along, keeping my eyes on him always.  I was doing kind of a side step trying to keep as much distance from him as I could while still trying to get away from him.  The barking never stopped and I was so afraid that he would lunge at me.  As I reached the corner of the street, I noticed a man who I shall call Cletus standing in his driveway watching the encounter with a sort of stupid grin on his face.  I asked him if he was the dog's owner and he said no, but not to worry, the dog was all bark, no bite.  He actually said he thinks the dog is funny.  "Real $#*#$%ing funny," I said as I kept moving further away from Cujo.  Once I made it to the next corner and was able to get off the street and out of site, I began running again, just trying to get more distance, but looking frequently over my shoulder.  As opposed to my last canine encounter, my confrontation with Cletus and Cujo left little to laugh about. 

I backed up my podcast and went back to run one and continued on my way.  Adrenaline was pumping now and I was beginning to get back into stride.  I will not allow myself to skip the stretching again because I felt tight through most of the run.  And since I wasn't dying at the end of my run today, I will prepare to move on to week 3 on Saturday.  In the meantime, I think I will go ahead and pick up a small can of pepper spray to keep with me on my runs.  I can't be that vulnerable again.  If people can't be responsible animal owners, then I will have to do what it takes to be protected.  I hope I'll never need to use it, but I know I need the peace of mind.

Though I am nervous about keeping up with the next level of the program, I need to keep pushing forward if I am to make progress.  As many of you have shared with me, this program is not the same for everyone.  If it takes me longer to master a week, that's OK.  If I struggle with a workout, it doesn't mean I've failed.  What is important is that I keep up with the routine, I make exercise a part of my life, and I get my body healthy and strong.  C25K isn't a race to a finish line, it is a map to better physical and mental health.  So each day, each morning that I rise to run, I will cling to my new mantra:  I CAN DO IT!

Week 2, Day 3 - pushing through the pain in the rain

I really enjoy starting my days with some solitude.  I love being able to do something for myself first thing in the morning rather than starting my day be responding to other people's needs (i.e. my kids).  I feel so alive, my cheeks hot and brow sweaty, legs rubbery and tired, heart pounding as I push to make my last few running strides strong.  And it is so refreshing to feel my breath returning to me, gasps returning to deep inhalations of crisp morning air.  It really is a great start to a day.  So, why is it that when the alarm goes off, I find it so dreadful to get out of bed?  Where's that old childhood enthusiasm that could get me out of bed with a spring in my step and excitement in my blood? 

Despite its absence, I slowly get out of bed and start getting myself dressed and stretched and ready to go.  Looks like a good morning to run, a little grayish, but dry and cool.  I've determined that I am going to pick up my pace this morning.  I don't want to watch a clock while I am running as that seems to have a negative psychological impact on me, so I remember where I was when I had finished my run last time and aim to be further along my route when I complete today's program.  So I get started and and in the middle of my first run, the rain started pouring down.  I wasn't prepared for it, so I got very wet, but it wasn't so bad and I guess I am glad that the rain didn't get the chance to give me pause this morning.  Running in the rain was actually refreshing in its own way, so now that is one less obstacle in my way in the future!

I found the first few intervals to be challenging, but I made it without great difficulty.  The third interval is where I started finding it hard to keep up my quicker pace.  I was panting and my muscles just burning by the end of 90 seconds and I barely felt ready to run again after two minutes.  My running slowed quite a bit from that point and while I did make it further than I did last time, I felt a little beat up.  Today should be the last of the week 2 workouts, but I don't feel entirely ready to move on.  Reading through other people's experiences on The Couch to 5K Facebook page, I know a lot of people repeat weeks until they feel more ready to move on.  I know that it isn't a big deal to do so, but still, I wonder if I'm just telling myself that I need more time because I am afraid.  I don't know.  I don't want to sell myself short, but I also don't want to move on before I am ready.  I feel like the confidence I build at every run propels me forward.  I fear what a bad experience would do to my mind set, so I think I will run another interval of week 2 before graduate to week 3.  I am going to go out there on Thursday with a positive attitude, ready to kick some ass because I know I CAN DO IT!